Lottery scratch tickets will no longer be available in candy themes, for fear that the children might be sucked in to state sanctioned gambling. Stupidity tax tickets will still be available in a wide variety of parent-friendly themes in order to draw the rest of you into state sanctioned gambling. Thank you for playing.
"I don't want to vote for a rock star. I want somebody who is going to take care of the issues."
- Eric Oleson, an administrator at South Puget Sound Community College, explaining his internal struggle on voting for or against U.S. Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill) as the next president.